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Wednesday, August 26th, 2009
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So after months (maybe even years) of being irritated all the time I talked to my doctor. It would seem that is impossible for 99.9% of the population to be wrong all the time. Not surprisingly my last post was about every one else being assholes. So I take this pill everyday and people don't piss me off so much. I decided this was a better idea than being fired for cussing someone out at ye ole' call center and getting fired.
I fear I may have chosen the less fun option.
~*Beck*~
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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It's been 70 weeks since my last confession.... err I mean post.
I still live. I find with each year more is known about the world, and about people. These days I tend to think a little less about the general population. More assholes in the world than good people. Still there are a few, if only those few would do more good works. I say this knowing that I don't honestly contribute that much to the world... suppose I should get off my ass and do something good instead of just wishing others would.
It'll most likely be another 70 months before I post again.
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Monday, January 14th, 2008
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So I think I'm stealing internet for Link Systems... (for the out of townies, it's a computer store).... Wireless card just started pulling up a signal... So, I haven't posted in forever. I still exist. A very busy/boring life, but I do prefer it like that. I'm working at Teletech now... So is Chris. We are doing well. That's all I've got to say, sorry I thought something would just come to me... I was wrong.
Beck
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, June 27th, 2007
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| Subject: | Posted using TxtLJ |
| Time: | 2:51 am. |
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I lay my head on my pillow, close my eyes and know I'm in for an awful night. What does a person do if the nightmare starts before the sleep?
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Thursday, June 14th, 2007
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| Subject: | Posted using TxtLJ |
| Time: | 11:24 pm. |
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I just watched Trembling Before G-D, great movie. I'm impresed by their faith, the Hebrew prayers are more beautiful than any words I have ever spoken.
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Wednesday, May 30th, 2007
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| Subject: | Posted using TxtLJ |
| Time: | 8:38 pm. |
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I went to the library today, and set my account up to work from my cell. It seems to work pretty well. The trouble is you only get 160 words.
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So here I am sitting in the library. I can read from my phone, but it is next to impossible to post from it. I still exist, and am making small improvements as time goes on. June 9th I'll finally be going to take my GED test. Yay for Becky. Paid in full and the date has been confirmed... I can't believe it took me 7 years to get to this point. Well at least it's a step.
I realized a few months back that by this point in my life it I had finished school an gone to collage that I could almost be a doctor by now. That's crazy, however I have not urgency to fallow that path now. I just couldn't handle the blood gore and death.
I am looking into the possibility of being a nursing tech. I thought about CNA, but I'm not willing to scrub shit off people. CNA has basically become the new orderly.
Anyway just thought I'd drop a line and say I'm still alive.
Beck
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I even got snubed by the smelly guy.
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Sunday, February 25th, 2007
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Wednesday, February 14th, 2007
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I just figured out how to post from my cell phone. Im moving tomorrow, if anyone is looking for some unpaid manual labor. Its time to get out of the hood. I quit my job @ Yellow Cab, decided it wasnt worth the stress. Ill take next week off to unpack, then look for work after that.
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Anyone who knows how to get in contact with Bonnie..... Please remind her she has until Monday to get her stuff out of the basement here. Not only are her items in the way, they are also collecting mold. (the basment stays wet most of the time.)
Beck
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, August 3rd, 2005
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I got my kitty back. $730.10...... He's doing good.... the cats and dogs are having to work everything out again... but I think they'll be fine. I was worried for a while that I would never see him again. I'm happy to have him home. Now I have to feed him prescription food to keep him from getting more kidney stones.
Beck
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It's too bad Myspace is so unreliable.
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Saturday, July 30th, 2005
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You know you live with to many men when:
The shower is stocked with a bottle of baby oil, and there are no babies around.....
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Wednesday, July 27th, 2005
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 I am The Chariot
The Chariot often appears when hard control is or could be in evidence. At its best, hard control is not brutal, but firm and direct. It is backed up by a strong will and great confidence. The Chariot can mean self-control or control of the environment. This card also represents victory. There are many types of wins; the Chariot's is of the win-lose type. Your success comes from beating the competition to become number one. Such moments are glorious in the right circumstances. For a full description of your card and other goodies, please visit LearnTarot.com
| What tarot card are you? Enter your birthdate.
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I found these in the herbs this morning. We ate them 45 minutes ago... I'll let you know if anything happens. **NOTE** We did check to make sure they were not poisonous.
**EDIT**
The shrooms seem to have been the right type, but not very potent. If I would have had more I would have tripped.... Oh well.... there will be more sometime.
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"Remember that time that I came in your house after we broke up...??? I tried to start a fight with you -jabbed my finger at your shoulder. You know, the day I screamed at you until I went red in the face... I was mad because you found out about my lies. Mad because you didn't want me any more... mad about everything... I didn't get my way, so I tried to hurt you. I spoke with all your ex-boyfriends, they were going to help me move. They hate you too... Everyone you leave hates you.... Such an awful person you are... You must be since years later all of them still hate you."
You didn't say this, thou you might as well have.... I guess you didn't need to.... However, since I'm talking to myself I might as well finish it out...
Sometimes we lie to ourselves.... Sometimes we lie to everyone. Most importantly... you wont be telling your stories to me anymore. I wish you the best of luck with your recovery... both from your surgery and from the years of abuse you have given yourself. In another life maybe I would be able to make you understand why things went the way they did.... maybe not. I'm sorry that you feel hurt... However, I have no remorse for leaving you or for starting a new relationship with Chris. My only regret is that I let things get to such an unbearable level before I said something. I should have broken up with you before you left town... As soon as you were gone I realized that we could not fix it... I tried to tell you over the phone, but you wouldn't hear it. When I told you it's over you responded by dismissing my statement and acting like I didn't know what I was talking about.
I hated the way that you talked to me and to everyone.... The way that you try to control every aspect of anything.... You try to pretend that you are in charge... Relationships are partnerships.... however... There are somethings that you only get to control once you contribute to the situation.... If you can't or don't work you are required to do other things to make yourself a worth wild member of a household.... Including but not limited to cleaning up after yourself.....
The point is not this trivial bull shit about whether or not you did house work... the point is that no matter what I say you are going to feel like you are the victim. You play the part well as long as long as you don't let people get close enough to realize that you always play the same part... Poor you, the whole world is out to get you.... Whatever... My message to you......
Only you can control what happens to you. Take responsibility for everything in your life and you will find yourself in a better place.... I think you have started working on this now... good job. Don't pick fights... the next time you try that with me you'll actually get one. I don't take other people's bullshit anymore. If you are going to try to convince the world you were so abused in the past... don't be the abuser now. No matter how drunk you are, no mater how coked up or what ever.... if you poke someone in the shoulder while screaming at you they have every right to punch you in the face....
Bonnie Madaline Faulkner:: We are moving you shit to the basement. You have 30 days from today to collect it. This is a public message, and our legal notice. Your mattress is being thrown away, it is a biohazard. Not only does it have all the blood and gore that were on it when you left, but the cats have also added a little special sauce. Anything that we are moving into the basement we will make sure it is put on pallets so that it does not get water damage. The moving team thanks you for capping you syringes.
I hear your surgery went well, good for you. I hope you heal nicely.
Rebecca LeAnne Smith
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Comments: Read 6 or Add Your Own.
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Here's my most recent pic.... eat your heart out "Lady Clarol".
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Comments: Read 8 or Add Your Own.
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malveenya's journal
peaceful.
complacent.
content.
grateful.
sleepy.
amused.
cheerful.